It’s new years day, 2016. The optimist in me has been able to hold on to holidays in my heart. While I don’t love the commercialization of the self-help wave that comes with the turn of the year, I DO think that we should periodically take a step back and examine if we’re living the life that we dreamed for ourselves. What am I doing? How do I feel about it? What changes could I make, big or small, to make life better for myself and those around me?
It’s been a whole year since I started thinking about moving on from the store. When I think about this past year, I feel… upset, sad, depressed, angry, disappointed, frustrated…. And there are a whole load of reasons why and how I got there but that’s not what I want to focus on. I do want to mention it because from the outside it seemed to be a very quick thing. Deciding to close the store was very difficult for me and it will take me a very long time to process emotionally, even though the physical store is gone.
“I’ve been meaning to…”
I’m thinking about all the things I’ve been meaning to do. If I wait too long I might lose my chance to do them. Whether it’s visiting a local shop at their new location, hanging out with someone I’d like to get to know a little better or daring to try something new. There’s a new sense of urgency in my life. Why am I waiting? I don’t know anymore. It’s time – do it now.
This comes to me not only through the swift turnaround of restarting the store in its new location to closing up shop in just two years…. It also comes from a bigger, more important turnaround. I’ve lost track of the customers and people I talked to on a daily basis who have recently lost someone they love, experienced a major hardship in their family’s life, or fallen ill themselves. How many of you are fighting or have fought cancer in the last few years? How many of you have slipped on the ice and spent more than a year in rehabilitation? How many of you are pinching pennies every day, just to keep your kids fed? How many of you said goodbye to someone with whom you thought you had a lot more time? Life is short and not always easy.
I want to be a better person and make life better for the people around me. I want to live and do things – simple things that I’ve been denying myself because I got lost in being a “small business owner.” Digging myself out of that place required physically dismantling it and now I can move on. There are so many things I want to do! For YOU, I am here – online and in person. It’s harder to drop in and see me because you have to call me or email me first, but I’m here. And I’ll be a much better me FOR you.
This is a very strange “New Year, New ME!” blog post, but I’ve been thinking about it for while. What’s wrong with trying to be a “new” me? If I can be a better person today than I was yesterday, that’s a WIN in my book. Let me know how YOU’RE doing, my yarn friends on the internet. I hope you’re looking forward to 2016 with hope and determination to make every day better than the last!